Have you ever thought about the impact of either being an introvert or an extrovert on your family relationships? Introverts recharge and gain energy through spending time alone. Extroverts recharge and gain energy when in the company of others.
When I think about the introverts in my life, I can see them drain of energy when we are in a group setting. On the other hand the extroverts in my life appear completely energized when we are in groups. Neither way/ is better or worse than the other.
So, what could this have to do with parenting? This blog is going to address the challenges of being an introverted parent with an extroverted child. Next week’s blog will address the challenges of being an extroverted parent with an introverted child.
The introverted parent with an extroverted child
The introverted parent needs time to him/herself to recharge. The parent loves the child and also needs time alone to feel energized. It can be challenging for the introverted parent to have an extroverted child because the child doesn’t need near as much time alone as the parent. This can be exhausting for the parent.
When I see this in my practice, often the parent feels some guilt for needing alone time. They love being a parent, but may find it more tiring that they were expecting it to be.
5 Things to do if you are an introvert and your child is an extrovert
- It can help just to recognize and accept you and your child are different people with different needs. That is okay.
- Be sure you get some of the time you need. None of us are as good in this world as we could be when we ignore our own needs. If you are an introvert and ignore your needs to have some time to yourself, chances are you will find it more difficult to parent in the way you truly want to. Take some of the time you need so you can enjoy parenting. In the end, this will help both you and your child!
- Recognize that just like you need time alone your child needs time with people. Try to be mindful of their need and intentionally get them involved with people/activities to get their social needs met. This can also take some of the pressure off you meeting all of this need.
- Be sure to create time in your lives when you and your child can connect (one on one if possible) to deepen your relationship.
- Depending on the age of the child having discussions about introversion/extroversion can be helpful. It is helpful for them to understand their own needs as a person. It is also helpful for them to understand yours.
Hopefully this was helpful! There are so many things that shape the relationships we have with those we love. I find it is helpful to create as much acceptance and understanding as we can. At the end of the day, it is the connection to those we love that we find to be most important!
As always, let us know if we can support you in creating better connections in your family. You can call 720-583-9332 for a free phone consultation!
Have a wonderful day!
Dr. Steffanie Stecker a licensed psychologist and the owner and clinical director of Mountain Vista Psychology, PLLC.
In addition, she is a board certified neurotherapist (BCN E5669) and board certified in QEEG (QEEG-D). Less than 100 people world wide are board certified in QEEG, which indicates competency in reading QEEGs and choosing neurofeedback protocols. Dr. Stecker is passionate about brain based effective therapy and creating a safe relationship for her clients to create change. She loves what she gets to do each day!